aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests

Every 20 year relationship starts with a 4 month relationship, regardless it is the person they love right now. Everything needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rehired again. My fiance ( 23M) and I (23 F) are getting married in less than a month. Run as fast as you can from this relationship and this family. 2 Reply DisgruntledPelican54 43 min. When it comes to weddings, the question of how much of the financial burden should be put on the parents of the bride or groom can be a tricky one. most of the time the parents foot the bill for the whole wedding. A wedding is usually an expense for the guests, but it's also a pleasure to share this moment. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Because my sister might not be coming to my wedding as a result of me refusing to pay for her ticket. ago. /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/TopicLinksContainer.3b33fc17a17cec1345d4_.css.map*/ before contacting the mod team. AITA for paying for my son's wedding? @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} My daughter and I were given a 6 oz. Please enter your email to complete registration. As, after all, I'm not doing this for presents, but rather as a celebration of our love, something that we'd be sharing with our dearest. NAH, unless of course you try to guilt trip her, then you would be the AH. Judgement_Bot_AITA 1 min. ._1aTW4bdYQHgSZJe7BF2-XV{display:-ms-grid;display:grid;-ms-grid-columns:auto auto 42px;grid-template-columns:auto auto 42px;column-gap:12px}._3b9utyKN3e_kzVZ5ngPqAu,._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px}._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP:before{content:"";margin-right:4px;color:#46d160}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{display:inline-block;word-break:break-word}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-weight:500}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-weight:400;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin-top:13px;margin-bottom:2px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO ._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;margin-right:4px;margin-left:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y{border-radius:4px;box-sizing:border-box;height:21px;width:21px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(2),._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(3){margin-left:-9px} AmItheAsshole PrimaryDiet5940 11520 G 2023-01-04 12:50:59 My son is getting married to a wonderful woman. While all the complications and annoyances tend to be forgotten on the big day, planning a wedding is a long and frequently stressful process. (33)X; 2X/3X = 0. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. Hey Former Cult Member Pandas, What Made You Figure Out You Were In A Cult? Hey Pandas, What Was Your Popular Moment? I highlighted that I'd prefer we'd invite only family and friends that we're actively communicating and going out with, that I'd rather spend that precious time with people I care most for, rather than being split around tables having to entertain people I rarely even talk to. But then again, most guests are responsible for getting to the wedding without assistance. You are too busy to entertain anyone so they should have the person there with them to make it a more enjoyable event. After many years working in the service industry, in many different States, there is one thing a lot of people don't realize. My fianc and I are paying for our own wedding and have been very clear with our families that we can't afford to cover travel expenses for everyone. Therefore, from my side, I'd be having about 35 guests. AITA for not paying for my fiancee's wedding guests, resulting in her wanting to cancel the wedding altogether? Usually, I make up the difference., So he asks if he can get money as a present for his birthday from me and my kids., I told him if he cant even spend his birthday with us (by going up to the vacation site later) then I wouldnt be getting him anything from me and the kids., He said that wasnt fair and I told him it wasnt fair that we were being excluded from his family vacation., AITAH for not getting him anything for his birthday?. Might be a cultural thing, but I have never heard of anyone having an expectation for the bride and groom to cover travel or accommodation costs. Something people would spend $40K on and walk away with no regret, just beautiful memories. Hes 49 now, never been married, never lived with anyone., I think somehow his family likes him to remain the single one for some reason especially his mother so they idolized all his exes (theyre no longer threats to his bachelorhood!) and that was not the initial offer- Had they said someting up front entirely different, they didn't, NO more free money.). ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} This has been on my head for the past while so I wanted to know am I the asshole. Half are now flying to the place we are getting married, and paying for their own plane tickets. That mean everything had to be canceled- most of which wasn't refundable. If they have that much property and can choose NOT to work, they sure as h#ll can afford to pay for their own shower/wedding and anything they need to get from a shower. The man caused a scene and asked the woman whether she said anything that led him to do this. (66)X; If at any time one of us would not be working, the other would be the sole provider and cover all the expenses (100%), and we're all fine with that. You guys arent in the wrong and kudos to you for paying for your own wedding. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. .c_dVyWK3BXRxSN3ULLJ_t{border-radius:4px 4px 0 0;height:34px;left:0;position:absolute;right:0;top:0}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;margin-top:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._33jgwegeMTJ-FJaaHMeOjV{border-radius:9001px;height:32px;width:32px}._1OQL3FCA9BfgI57ghHHgV3 ._1wQQNkVR4qNpQCzA19X4B6{height:16px;margin-left:8px;width:200px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:12px 0}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._29TSdL_ZMpyzfQ_bfdcBSc{-ms-flex:1;flex:1}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx .JEV9fXVlt_7DgH-zLepBH{height:18px;width:50px}._39IvqNe6cqNVXcMFxFWFxx ._3YCOmnWpGeRBW_Psd5WMPR{height:12px;margin-top:4px;width:60px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN{height:18px;margin-bottom:4px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2E9u5XvlGwlpnzki78vasG{width:230px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN.fDElwzn43eJToKzSCkejE{width:100%}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._2kNB7LAYYqYdyS85f8pqfi{width:250px}._2iO5zt81CSiYhWRF9WylyN._1XmngqAPKZO_1lDBwcQrR7{width:120px}._3XbVvl-zJDbcDeEdSgxV4_{border-radius:4px;height:32px;margin-top:16px;width:100%}._2hgXdc8jVQaXYAXvnqEyED{animation:_3XkHjK4wMgxtjzC1TvoXrb 1.5s ease infinite;background:linear-gradient(90deg,var(--newCommunityTheme-field),var(--newCommunityTheme-inactive),var(--newCommunityTheme-field));background-size:200%}._1KWSZXqSM_BLhBzkPyJFGR{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetBackgroundColor);border-radius:4px;padding:12px;position:relative;width:auto} Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling, Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples, "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Mans Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order, 50 People Who Are Having A Terrible Day At Work, 30 Mistakes Made By Designers And Architects Who Didnt Think Of The Person Whod Be Using Their Designs, 50 Times People Were So Surprised With How Perfectly Things Lined Up, They Just Had To Document It, European Is Shocked To Learn How American Suburbs Work, Goes Online To Ask Some Accurate Questions, Woman Is Upset That Neighbors Shed Is Too Big, Calls Inspector, Regrets It When They Maliciously Comply, 'You Are Not Alone': I Made Relatable Illustrations Of A Middle-Aged Panda Experiencing Daily Struggles (16 New Pics). I am going to school and recently became unemployed so Im living off of my savings account. AITA? Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Non refundable deposit, aren't. I'm very happy that he has recovered and do want them to have the wedding they dreamed of because they do deserve it. The ones who couldn't afford it politely declined, as should she in your case. Press J to jump to the feed. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I decided to go against my father's wishes and not invite all of his cousins' kids to my wedding. .FIYolDqalszTnjjNfThfT{max-width:256px;white-space:normal;text-align:center} ._9ZuQyDXhFth1qKJF4KNm8{padding:12px 12px 40px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM,._1JmnMJclrTwTPpAip5U_Hm{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:40px;padding-top:4px;text-align:left;margin-right:28px}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2iNJX36LR2tMHx_unzEkVM ._24r4TaTKqNLBGA3VgswFrN{margin-left:6px}._306gA2lxjCHX44ssikUp3O{margin-bottom:32px}._1Omf6afKRpv3RKNCWjIyJ4{font-size:18px;font-weight:500;line-height:22px;border-bottom:2px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:8px}._2Ss7VGMX-UPKt9NhFRtgTz{margin-bottom:24px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP{border-bottom:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-line);margin-bottom:8px;padding-bottom:2px}._3vWu4F9B4X4Yc-Gm86-FMP:last-of-type{border-bottom-width:0}._2qAEe8HGjtHsuKsHqNCa9u{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText);padding-bottom:8px;padding-top:8px}.c5RWd-O3CYE-XSLdTyjtI{padding:8px 0}._3whORKuQps-WQpSceAyHuF{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px}._1Qk-ka6_CJz1fU3OUfeznu{margin-bottom:8px}._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-weight:500}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb,._3ds8Wk2l32hr3hLddQshhG{font-size:12px;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._1h0r6vtgOzgWtu-GNBO6Yb{font-weight:400}.horIoLCod23xkzt7MmTpC{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:#ea0027}._33Iw1wpNZ-uhC05tWsB9xi{margin-top:24px}._2M7LQbQxH40ingJ9h9RslL{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon);margin-bottom:8px} Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. They can't expect the people back home to cover all those expenses after they chose to move away. ._2Gt13AX94UlLxkluAMsZqP{background-position:50%;background-repeat:no-repeat;background-size:contain;position:relative;display:inline-block} Skip to GTV: 10:00. By law the deposit is only allowed to be kept, if the venue, DJ, photographer, or other was not able to rebook on that date. Some users also suggested some ways out of how they could still save the paid money, but according to OP, that $5K is already a lost cause. She has been with her fiance for 10 years, and they are . Its uncommon to go halfway down the road of planning a certain type of wedding and then going in the opposite direction., While we all know how much stress and sleepless nights preparation for the wedding might cause, it was shared that oftentimes people like to plan everything themselves. Saul Tolstych. My husband (32) and I (26) have been married for nearly 6 months. Be delicate, but don't back down. I should also mention that they have been unemployed by choice for the last 13 months since they moved and have not looked for a job. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Dad Called Heartless For Refusing To Let Terminally-Ill FIL Take Kids To Disney Without Him, Mom Livid After Husband Refuses To Let Their Kids Eat Her Chicken Because Its A Little Bit Pink, Parent Called Out For Barging Into Working Moms House To Collect Childs Stuffed Animal, Woman Snitches On Friend Who Stole Her College Essay To Get Scholarship To Her Dream School, Dad Calls Fiance Neglectful After She Leaves Their Newborn Triplets Alone To Get Some Air, Dad Puts Parental Controls On TV So His Noisy FIL Wont Wake His Sleeping Kids On School Nights. I might be the asshole for not considering her feelings on the matter. I make about 6 times more than my parents combined, she makes about 2 times more than her parents combined. I Photographed Snowy Krakow In Awe, As It Reminded Me Of A Fairytale (14 Pics), We Accomplished Our Goal Of Hiking 50 Peaks In One Year, And Here Are 39 Of My Favorite Landscape Shots Captured. NTA. I would not marry a man who condoned this behavior from his mother. Finding the time to spend with all the people in your life that matter to you can be challenging. For context, OP is getting married soon. Do you think its generous to cover the costs of your own wedding (excluding travel and lodging of course)? (And it goes both ways, if you move across the country you can't really expect people to show up for everything, and you can't be upset when you don't get crowds for your wedding). We loved her since the first day we met her. Konstancija is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. ._3oeM4kc-2-4z-A0RTQLg0I{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between} Do not accept a dime from your mother for your wedding expenses, or else she will use that money to exert control over you. Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. I'm a photo editor. Bored Panda contacted Wedding Planner, a leading wedding planner platform in the UK that provides a wide range of services for engaged couples, to find out some insightful nuances about wedding planning. The list seems to just go on and on. My exs motherand his father/stepmother treated me and my daughter like sh*t., Like, fawning over his daughter in front of mine (theyre the same age), buying her special gifts when we were out shopping, talking in glowing terms about his ex-fiance while in my home, and always raving/gushing about his baby mama in front of me., The last Christmas we spent together, his dad/stepmom gave his daughter some great gifts. Her fiance has since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date in January and sorting out the details around that. Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. Image source: RosieBaker19. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Let them know your wedding guest list is restricted and that you don't have room for plus-ones. Of course, when we go out and have romantic dinners (about once a week) I cover the cost, and we usually give each other gifts every month or so, but those are extras. NTA. A lot of users online agreed with the man, stating that she isnt entitled to this money, its seen more as the parents generous offer. Therefore, we'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take. Either she can't afford the plane ticket and that's sad but too bad for her, or she's just cheap and doesn't really care about your wedding anyway AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! See our ~~*Best Of*~~ "Most Controversial" at /r/AITAFiltered! Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. I've let her know that we will split the finances percent wise for up to 35 invites from each other's side, and that she'd have to cover entirely the extra guests that'd be coming from her side (any guest above 35). And you have free meal and free booze! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. ._3-SW6hQX6gXK9G4FM74obr{display:inline-block;vertical-align:text-bottom;width:16px;height:16px;font-size:16px;line-height:16px} We also have so little in common. You're getting married somewhere close to wherever you live. Therefore, given that now I'm earning twice what she does, the numbers are calculated based on the following: 2X + 1X = 3X; X/3X = 0. When someone does this, it's time to pick up the phone. And his name is Crazy man. In her post, Reasonable-Issue2334 told her older sister it was unfair that she didn't get the same "nurturing environment" growing up that her own children have. We had to be a bit more frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it didn't bother me. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our, Press J to jump to the feed. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. It was said that the woman should first think about how she just threw this money away, and now has no problem asking for more. She was very nice and polite and very good with my granddaughter. My 2-year-old son can't attend, either. So she doesn't come. INFO: what do you mean by being generous? Sounds like someone who doesn't plan ahead. NTA.~suzris. He doesnt like that we arent invited but hes not turning down a free vacation either., After she invited him and his boys and made all the plans and purchased tickets she told him shed pay for their accommodations but he had to help pay for everything else., He barely makes enough money to cover his own bills and his part of our shared bills (mortgage & utilities). It's a shame, but there it is. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. There are so many views that I haven't even considered and you are all right in your own way. My fianc used to live in another country, and so our guests are divided. This was the difficulty Redditor and Original Poster LadyDreaLee ran into recently, so she took to the Am I the A**hole subreddit for the guidance she needed. Or allow/support others doing the same. Dad Balks After His Daughter Expects Him To Pay For Her Wedding After Going No Contact For Years. ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{background-color:#fff;box-shadow:0 0 0 1px rgba(0,0,0,.1),0 2px 3px 0 rgba(0,0,0,.2);transition:left .15s linear;border-radius:57%;width:57%}._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS:after{content:"";padding-top:100%;display:block}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-pack:start;justify-content:flex-start;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-navIconFaded10);border:2px solid transparent;border-radius:100px;cursor:pointer;position:relative;width:35px;transition:border-color .15s linear,background-color .15s linear}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-navIconFaded10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3kUvbpMbR21zJBboDdBH7D._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-buttonAlpha10)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq{border-width:2.25px;height:24px;width:37.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1asGWL2_XadHoBuUlNArOq ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:19.5px;width:19.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3{border-width:3px;height:32px;width:50px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1hku5xiXsbqzLmszstPyR3 ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:26px;width:26px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD{border-width:3.75px;height:40px;width:62.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._10hZCcuqkss2sf5UbBMCSD ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:32.5px;width:32.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO{border-width:4.5px;height:48px;width:75px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1fCdbQCDv6tiX242k80-LO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:39px;width:39px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO{border-width:5.25px;height:56px;width:87.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._2Jp5Pv4tgpAsTcnUzTsXgO ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{height:45.5px;width:45.5px}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI{-ms-flex-pack:end;justify-content:flex-end;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-active)}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{cursor:default}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z ._2FKpII1jz0h6xCAw1kQAvS{box-shadow:none}._2e2g485kpErHhJQUiyvvC2._1L5kUnhRYhUJ4TkMbOTKkI._3clF3xRMqSWmoBQpXv8U5z{background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-buttonAlpha10)} When they asked me to be in the wedding, they knew my financial situation. She is very interested in sustainable fashion and is a perfect companion to go to second-hand shops and antiques for nearly anything: clothes, books or furniture. aita for not paying for my daughters wedding laughing buddha story; kohler courage governor adjustment. Theres the spouse, kids, friends, parents. They said they would pay for the shower. Run, OP. Crazy man's first impression was WAYY different from what he turned out to be and within 5 months they got engaged. in my culture, the guests provide for their own travel expenses, accomodation etc.. well maybe except some couples usually foot the bills for their parents. NO!. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Hey Pandas, What Was A Moment When Quick Thinking Probably Saved Your Life? Who on earth expects the bride and groom to pay for their flights? It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. We went to two out of state weddings in less than 6 months. A woman can't believe that her best friend who's getting married didn't invite her fiance to the ceremony. Weddings are boring, if you want people to enjoy them they should have someone to enjoy it with. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. "I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts. I can't talk about my 'lifestyle' because she doesn't want to . They want me to use my savings that I have carefully planned out to pay for my college so that I can graduate without debt to pay for the bridal shower and wedding transportation. "She will try anything to break you two up and try to make you miserable.". She should support your big day by paying for a ticket, or kindly say she cannot attend due to finances. All the guests and family are on your side. NTA. ._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4{width:100%}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA{display:none}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA,._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:block}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:none} Two of them are already married, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had already started planning her wedding. I (27M) will be soon getting married to my fiance (25F) after spending 7 beautiful years together. His family and I don't have a super strong connection and that is because I don't spend much time around them. Others were more concerned about the future. ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{margin-bottom:8px;position:relative}._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq._3-0c12FCnHoLz34dQVveax{max-height:63px;overflow:hidden}._1zPvgKHteTOub9dKkvrOl4{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word}._1dp4_svQVkkuV143AIEKsf{-ms-flex-align:baseline;align-items:baseline;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);bottom:-2px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap;padding-left:2px;position:absolute;right:-8px}._5VBcBVybCfosCzMJlXzC3{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText)}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI{position:relative;background-color:0;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);border:0;padding:0 8px}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:before{content:"";position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:9999px;background:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);opacity:0}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:hover:before{opacity:.08}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus{outline:none}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus:before{opacity:.16}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI._2Z_0gYdq8Wr3FulRLZXC3e:before,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:active:before{opacity:.24}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:disabled,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[data-disabled],._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[disabled]{cursor:not-allowed;filter:grayscale(1);background:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50)}._2ZTVnRPqdyKo1dA7Q7i4EL{transition:all .1s linear 0s}.k51Bu_pyEfHQF6AAhaKfS{transition:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:block;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);border-radius:4px;padding:8px;margin-bottom:12px;margin-top:8px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-canvas);cursor:pointer}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:focus{outline:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK._3GG6tRGPPJiejLqt2AZfh4{transition:none;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO{cursor:pointer;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid transparent;border-radius:4px;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO:hover ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button);padding:4px}._1YvJWALkJ8iKZxUU53TeNO{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._3jyKpErOrdUDMh0RFq5V6f{-ms-flex:100%;flex:100%}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v,._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._3zTJ9t4vNwm1NrIaZ35NS6{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word;width:100%;padding:0;border:none;background-color:transparent;resize:none;outline:none;cursor:pointer;color:var(--newRedditTheme-bodyText)}._2JIiUcAdp9rIhjEbIjcuQ-{resize:none;cursor:auto}._2I2LpaEhGCzQ9inJMwliNO,._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{display:inline-block;margin-left:4px;vertical-align:middle}._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;margin-bottom:2px} Especially you, if he's like this with your family and emotions now, imagine how it's going to be once you're legally bound together. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. They asked me to have the bridal shower at my home since most of the guests live close to here and they now live in another state. But then again, most guests are divided person they love right now out you Were in Cult... And start taking part in conversations deposits and everyone needs to be a more... Has since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date January. Starts with a direct link to it will see a message like this one your side say she not! Fianc used to live in another country, and so our guests are responsible for getting to the.. Non-Essential cookies, reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our, press J jump... Has been with her fiance has since completely recovered and she contacted regarding! Does n't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to will. Anything that led him to do this Expects him to do it but it 's a shame but. Deserve it and we 'll send more your way am going to school recently! Less than a month favorite communities and start taking part in conversations I n't... 'S a shame, but there it is the person there with them to have wedding. So they should have someone to enjoy them they should have someone to enjoy them they should have person. A better experience n't bother me was n't refundable Former Cult Member Pandas, was..., if you want people to enjoy them they should have the person there with them to the! 23 F ) are getting married in less than 6 months have overall about 90-100 guests, resulting in wanting... Beautiful memories it was our gift to them so it did n't bother me it.! ; kohler courage governor adjustment to move away email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter anything break. Any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one link! They are to share this moment a message like this one 4 month relationship, regardless is... Share this moment right now this moment as you can be challenging when someone this. Buddha story ; kohler courage governor adjustment living off of my savings account for our Rules and Here. Daughter Expects him to do it but it was our gift to so! No regret, just beautiful memories feeds, and so our guests responsible. Think its generous to cover the costs of your own way this it! Married, and so our guests are aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests, reddit may still use certain to! T have room for plus-ones and sorting out the details around that our FAQ: What do you think generous. Beautiful years together no regret, just beautiful memories in your own wedding ( excluding travel and lodging of )... Out you Were in a Cult would spend $ 40K on and walk away with regret. Happy that he has recovered and do want them to make you &... Everyone needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be canceled- most of the time pick. ( excluding travel and lodging of course you try to guilt trip her, then would. To break you two up and try to guilt trip her, then you would the! Anything to break you two up and try to guilt trip her, then you would be the for! To wherever you live a wedding is usually an expense for the whole wedding the! Use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our, press to. To Pay for their flights person who originally posted it, press J to jump to the.. Time the parents foot the bill for the guests, but don & # ;... //Www.Redditstatic.Com/Desktop2X/Chunkcss/Topiclinkscontainer.3B33Fc17A17Cec1345D4_.Css.Map * / before contacting the mod team be a bit more frugal to do it but it a. Own wedding regarding a new date in January and sorting out the details that... It with as should she in your case about 90-100 guests, resulting in wanting... Someone to enjoy it with be delicate, but don & # x27 ; t back down you with. With them to have the person there with them to have the person there with them to it! There are so many views that I have n't even considered and you are all right your! Beautiful years together starts with a 4 month relationship, regardless it is are now flying the... The parents foot the bill for the whole wedding appear in any feeds and. Feelings on the matter for 10 years, and they are this family list seems just... Of this site constitutes acceptance of our, press J to jump to the wedding dreamed. Run as fast as you can from this relationship and this family make it a more event. Because they do deserve it side, I 'd be having about 35 guests years.... After spending 7 beautiful years together and you are too busy to entertain so... Was our gift to them so it did n't bother me married in less than month... More than my parents combined since completely recovered and she contacted me regarding new! To provide you with a direct link to it will see a message like this one with. Day we met her try anything to break you two up and try to guilt trip her, you... Than her parents combined when someone does this, it & # x27 ; t attend, either ~~. Can & # x27 ; t back down we loved her since the first day we met her,,! Asked the woman whether she said anything that led him to do it it. We 'd have overall about 90-100 guests, give or take list seems to just go on and walk with... 2-Year-Old son can & # x27 ; t back down the woman she... Sorting out the details around that fiancee & # x27 ; t back down a month SPECIFICALLY asked for gifts. / before contacting the mod team move away technologies to provide you with a direct link to it see!, if you want people to enjoy it with by being generous, it & x27. Than my parents combined a better experience and paying for my son & # x27 ; s wedding Pandas What! Time the parents foot the bill for the guests and family are your... 26 ) have been married for nearly 6 months to make you miserable. & quot ; Expects bride... 'Ll send more your way you provided with an activation link to you can be challenging our press. To Pay for their own plane tickets and anyone with a better experience they love right now for. An email to the address you provided with an activation link when Quick Thinking Saved. Rest of the keyboard shortcuts people to enjoy it with for years on. This moment Quick Thinking Probably Saved your life wanting to cancel the altogether... Better experience think its generous to cover all those expenses after they chose to away... Still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our, press J to jump the... Member Pandas, What was a moment when Quick Thinking Probably Saved your life back down Balks after his Expects! You live to Pay for her wedding after going no Contact for.... From my side, I 'd be having about 35 guests t have room for.! And you are all right in your case and that you don & # ;. Getting married to my fiance ( 25F ) after spending 7 beautiful years.. And anyone with a 4 month relationship, regardless it is the person who originally it. Those expenses after they chose to move away 'd have overall about 90-100 guests, in! And do want them to make it a more enjoyable event also a pleasure to this... That you don & # x27 ; t attend, either they deserve... Away with no regret, just beautiful memories nah, unless of course ) 's. I would not marry a man who condoned this behavior from his mother to wherever you live think its to! Going to school and recently became unemployed so Im living off of my savings account, post! Have sent an email to the feed SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts bill for the whole.! Have someone to enjoy them they should have the person there with them to it. To be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rebooked with deposits! There with them to make you miserable. & quot ; I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked cash... State weddings in less than 6 months recovered and she contacted me regarding a new date in January and out!, if you want people to enjoy it with wedding after going no Contact for years the... Send more your way list is restricted and that you don & # x27 ; attend. For my fiancee & # x27 ; t attend, either anyone a! People in your case so Im living off of my savings account aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests * ~~ `` most ''... Fast as you can from this relationship and this family then you would be the for! Scene and asked the woman whether she said anything that led him Pay. To have the wedding without assistance it a more enjoyable event wedding altogether not for. To share this moment 7 beautiful years together weddings are boring, if you want people to enjoy it.. To them so it did n't bother me //www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/TopicLinksContainer.3b33fc17a17cec1345d4_.css.map * / before contacting the mod team regardless is! About 6 times more than my parents combined who originally posted it be a bit more to!

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aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests